Krampus Nights: Shigger Edition

Fuck it.

That's a powerful statement when used properly. It expresses the exclamation that one has reached their limit, their patience at an end. It also expresses the desire to engage in sexual activity with an item, or person perceived as an object. It's a potent statement. Fuck it, fuck me, fuck you, fuck him, fuck her, fuck that, fuck this, fuck the fucking fuckers! It can be an ugly expression, or used so much that the word saturates the vocabulary. Overuse can tend to blur or diffuse the meaning, watering it down to less potency like a drop of Blair's 6 AM Reserve in a 55 gallon drum of stew. The taste is still there, but to those constantly exposed to it, it doesn't have the same kick as it would to virgin senses who hear such in a blue moon. So perhaps it's due to the saturation, or the desire to expand onto the lexicon of those that read my blogs or listen to Creature Feature. So on the beginning of Krampus Nights 2009, I would like to give you a new word. And I guarantee those that read or listen to me knows at least one person that fits this term. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you....SHIGGER!

Given a post I made earlier this year where I was accused of racism where there clearly was none exhibited, people seemed to try to pick a fight with me on the simplest, most senseless things to try and prove their own points. Given the level of behavior I have both witnessed and experienced firsthand, I find this word as a possible necessity. If you're wondering, here's my proposed definition. Shigger: Superhero or villain acting ignorantly, negatively, in a derogatory manner. It is NOT based on skin color, ethnicity, sexual orientation religious beliefs or lack thereof or ancestry. This term is applied to those that exist in the superhero or supervillain communities in any aspect, even at costume parties. If you have a costume or alter ego and act in a pathetic manner, then the word applies.

To paraphrase Martin Luther King Jr. from the Boondocks episode Return of the King, allow me to explain what I observe from a certain 'supervillain' group and those associated with it based on their behavior.
"That's what I see now. Shiggers. And you don't want to BE a shigger. Because shiggers are living contradictions! Shiggers are filled with unfulfilled ambition! Shiggers wax and wane, they love to complain! Shiggers love to hear themselves talk but hate to explain! Shiggers love being another man's judge and jury! Shiggers procrastinate until it's time to worry! Shiggers LOVE to be late! Shiggers HATE to hurry!"

You see, the above statement was made due to a false perception I anticipated. I have discovered a group of individuals who exist solely to act as parasites. The claim is to observe those acting in dangerous situations, endangering themselves by their actions as well as others by acting as vigilantes in costumes. The excuse appears to be that if left unchecked, these people will not only look ridiculous, but cause a threat to people by acting as a vigilante, ambushing people believed to be committing a crime. The potential harm these heroes could cause are not limited to physical harm to themselves as well as their adversaries, but potential harm to innocent people mistakenly identified as criminals, or even other innocents caught up in friendly fire should someone pull out a gun or be hit with the hero's makeshift weapons. The actions caused could potentially do harm to those that are costumed activists, trying to make actual changes in a positive light to their communities. The negativity of one will counter and cast a damning shadow on the other. Now, these are valid points. However, more than not, I have noticed these parasites hiding under this paper mache turtle shell of good intentions, latching onto the actions of others to sustain them, spewing venom and gossip worse than Perez Hilton in a Mardi Gras mask. They're not contributors to anything positive, they're simply hecklers. Faceless members of a crowd. Because these individuals thrive on the attention of others, I am somewhat reluctant to give them any further exposure.

But that isn't going to stop me from doing so. I'm just laying the groundwork with salt so these slugs will properly shrivel under the hot lamps. And I'm not even talking about The Menstruating Mudworm this time, simply because he seems to have caught the Canadian shut-the-fuck-up dysentery. No my friends, I'm talking about those that inhabit the blog of the invertebrate organization. ROACH. This also extends to the people that frequent there, even if they do not officially hold memberships. I have jousted more than once with the people there...this is another item that isn't bewildering so much as disappointing. With people struggling so long to reach the top of the food chain, why do some feel compelled to join groups or take identities that reflect lesser creatures that at best, seem to have an advantage of being annoying at best, disease carrying vermin at worst? Perhaps because they wish to invoke a primal fear of being a part of nature that overwhelms people despite superiority on the planet as a way to humble others. More likely than not, it's probably just to be a momentary discomfort whose greatest aspiration is to be promoted to pain in the ass. Great, they aspire to invoke the totem of the mosquito biting someone's left cheek.

Which brings me to my first candidate, Lord Malignance, better to be addressed as the Golden Zoidberg. At first, the best this person could be seen as is sycophant. While at first doing a fair job to call out rampant vigilantes, it would appear this being also had his head up the White Skull's ass so far he could write off conversations as prostate exams. Potty tentacle indeed. But now, it appears his claiming of a primary foe who wants nothing to do with him as well as a handful of minions seems to have made him arrogant as of late. Among these clues are his recent squabbling with his former chatmate about a 'bromance' with me, as well as going onto the chatroom of Creature Feature, talking about little more than bashing me, including accusations of needing to come out of the closet. I find this absolutely hilarious! The entity that hid behind Lovecraftian imagery of Cthulu, now wearing a Futurama mask and the hand-me-downs of Neal 'Dr. Horrible' Patrick Harris accusing ME of being gay? Not to mention the lack of wishing to interact with me directly when I DO appear on the chat, mostly trying to save face before your followers. By the way...when one of your minions, who has the word 'minion' in his title resembles a hornless Krampus, and you have my name in your mouth more than the dick of Liberace's lover? Shigger, please!

This displays one of the greatest flaws of this group's mindset. Fear. Bullies are always cowards who use whatever advantage they have to try and influence others. Stand up to them, show people what they are, the illusion is gone. Until you muster the courage to actually confront me, much less someone you know who doesn't give a fraction of a shit about your egotistical pursuits, you'll NEVER have any substance. Nothing but a hollow shell, a mask with no one of significance behind it. And stop worrying about where I put my dick, you only have to worry about that if we become cellmates and I'm feeling....anxious, if you know what I mean.

Speaking of asses, this next one almost fell under my radar for lack of anything interesting to bring up. Agent Beryllium is a woman amongst the ranks, a welcome change of pace who appears to have a wit about her. That's fine. And I didn't have a single thing to say to or about this woman until recently. In a thread on the ROACH blog, she decided to mention the fact that Krampus, being a creature of folklore, means that this identity is not capable of copyright.

Really?

No, seriously. Really? That was your best shot. That was your big jab.

I KNOW Krampus isn't copyrightable. AND I DON'T CARE. I never did! Of course, I also know the legalities and loopholes around such things should I wish to pursue them as well, so I was content to let it go. Until I saw something on her blog, which I both found a sense of respect, but equal disturbance. It appears that two people logged in anonymously to harass her about items brought up by her with regards to the appearance of RLSH's on their Myspace profiles. Since she was playing critic, it appears some made comments about her hair, and went farther than that in their insults. Out of retaliation, she apparently discovered the IP addresses as well as cities and states of her posters. What's more, she posted them on her blog!

Now, I'm of two minds about this action. One, my roommate and I have been victims of cyber-stalking that turned to in person stalking. Posts, phone calls, destruction of private property while driving off late at night, it was more than frustrating. Especially when one threat stated the desire to commit rape, murder, then necrophilia against someone close to me. This is the kind of invertebrate that deserves to have such means taken against them! Expose them, reveal the attackers, expose them to the light of day and contact the authorities to deal with them, humiliation or damage/harm caused to them out of self-defense is a bonus.

However, given that The White Skull had done something similar to a minor earlier this year simply for being a heckler, which is ironic given their natures, there appears to have been a line crossed. Revealing the name, location and photo of said individual placing them at risk? This borders on the same behavior that the RLSV's claiming to watch the watchmen aspire to cease. It puts people's lives and property at risk. As I mentioned above, defending oneself against an attack is one thing. And as tempting as it may be to cause harm to those individuals, the second you go overboard, you run the risk of becoming that which you damn. This is something Krampus knows all too well from personal experience. So I'm going to make this statement to Agent Beryllium. I'm sure in the future we may exchange words. I also noticed how you became defensive when your person was attacked, also stating how you were the target of verbal attacks when you were younger. I understand that. But I'm strongly advising you not to use your skills to threaten me. Posting any information of my location or current IP address will threaten my roommate, an innocent party and someone completely undeserving of continued harassment or exposure. I hope you don't plan on using your capabilities to bully others, otherwise this could be a problem that will provoke a reaction in others, not just myself. I'm not stating the action of others as a threat, just an observation. There's no need to post my location, you can hear my accent on Creature Feature. But this is the posting: For my personal property, trespassers will be shot, stabbed or otherwise retaliated against. If my location were posted, you would be contributing to cyber-stalking, as well as actual stalking, potentially ending someone's life in self-defense. I'd like to believe by some sliver of optimism that you wouldn't wish to subject anyone to such a thing. Because if my IP/location were posted by ANYONE reading this, I WILL track them down and pay them a personal visit. All it would take is being pushed too far, and that's the line. That would be the trigger for the sentence that started this blog...fuck it. Please do not push someone with a history of suicidal depression into a corner of lawlessness because they've had enough, and see no reason to continue except for revenge, then suicide after the pain has been caused. We're both supposed to be preventing this from happening and destroying lives. At least, I am. Don't cross that line with me. That's an order.

Here's someone else that nearly escaped the radar, except that his crescent head seemed to get caught on the clothesline. Calamity. The Duct Tape masked Mac Tonight of supposed villainy. Once again, I wouldn't have cared about this individual. Except that he was at the epicenter of the single reason I manifested in response. The verbal attack on DC's Guardian. The post has been removed, the closest things to apologies offered. Many were infuriated with The Potentate for this ill-researched blog, but worst of all was the implication that this pillar of his corner of the community was accused of possibly being a pedophile.

You have no idea how damaging that was, or could have been. A completely false accusation based on a photo with a child. Tempers flared like firestorms, attacks were made with hurtful words on both sides of the communities. In the end, the post went away, and The Potentate may have been wrongfully accused. Yes, his post was made without all the facts, but the resulting flame war nearly cost a man his reputation. And in the end, though The Potentate may have started the post, he in fact did not call DC the word.

But Calamity did.

Calamity, you're NOTHING. A braggart who cares nothing about the reputation of others as long as yours is somehow boosted. I held back from posting this out of respect to DC and trying to let this entire debacle calm down. But your involvement was not overlooked. And being the better man, I'm sure he may, if not already has, forgiven you. BUT I NEVER WILL. This isn't about making jokes. You almost cost a man his identity, his life. May whatever God you believe in have mercy on you. From this point on, I will not. You're just an unfunny joke. And everyone is going to know how unfunny the joke is. And that's the worst thing ever, to be mocked because you can't even do THAT right.

Which leads us to the ringmaster of this mudshow, The Potentate. By the way, congratulations on the child. Don't fuck her up too badly, or else someone may have to call Child Services.

See what I did there?

Karmic jabs aside, I could go into more detail, but something else has recently occurred. You might notice I haven't really gone after my most vocal jousting partner, The White Skull. Well, there's a reason for that. Something has happened with ROACH that has ramifications for everyone associated with the group, full blown members or not. Something that deserves to be told, something I believe you all deserve to hear. But due to the nature of it and everyone involved, I stated that out of courtesy, I wouldn't be the one to reveal what has happened. That is The Potentate's position. I said I wouldn't say it first. But this was weeks ago, and The Potentate has lolly-gagged, taking advantage of what little good nature I have. In trying to remind The Potentate of his obligations, I've left a reminder after practically every blog on the ROACH board. Contact your local Potentate and ask him what I'm talking about. Or better, what I'm NOT talking about. But my courtesy goes only so far. If The Potentate doesn't reveal the news by Christmas Eve, I will. This affects everyone connected with ROACH, or aspire to.

Edit: It has been brought to my attention that another version of the word I chose to make up already existed in the Urban Dictionary. Of course, my definition was clearly defined as not having anything to do with one's ethnicity. It also apparently means a mispronunciation of the word 'sugar' or a name for one's dog. Given the flexible nature of the word and lack of clear definition, I insist that I NEVER used the term for a racial or gender slander. In fact, one can edit the Urban Dictionary with little effort. With that said, I take up the stand that Randal Green did in Clerks 2 with the term porch-monkey, referring to himself and never intended to be a word of prejudice. He worked to take the word back for HIS definition, and I will do the same. Oh, I'm not taking the post down, I'm simply reclaiming the term in the fashion I used it from those who use it the prejudicial way.

And in parting, please tune into Creature Feature for Krampus Nights in December, and here's a little diddy to warm the cockles of your hearts.